Annalisa's Blog: Real Life

I realize that for the most part I tend to only post all the cute and happy times on my blog...and for good reason. The happy times are what I want to remember- what I want my boys to remember. However, (and this may come as a shock) I am not perfect, my boys are not perfect, my life is not perfect, but I feel that 95% of the time I'm doing the best I can and that simply has to be good enough. I would love to say I'm a mom who never yells, always has a calm voice and an endless reserve of patience, but that is not reality. I raise my voice too often, lose patience too easily, and I'll admit that I inwardly chuckle as I outwardly cringe when my sweet toddler innocently says "dammit."
I get frustrated with my boys because, well, I sincerely believe no other kids can possibly ignore their mother to the extent that mine do. I excitedly look forward to summer break, with just a teenie-tiny bit of dread knowing my boys will be home 24/7 with no school to give me a chance to come up for air. Afternoon naps are my time to be in a silent house- get some housework done while listening to a dvr'd show in peace, and during the summer those silent times are nonexistent. As it is I wake up at 5am to run and have a tranquil hour or two without someone asking for something.
But you know what is so great? For each time I lose my cool, or the boys don't listen, there are ten sweet memories to hold on to...and this is why I love being a mom.
I watch my boys work together to fix lunches, gather backpacks, and untie laces in the morning so they won't be late for school. My heart melted when I overheard Landon say to Carson "This is so much better than fighting." I see the other get upset when one of them tells me something mean another kid said or did to them at school. Even when they are arguing and swear life would be much better without the other, they are still so protective of each other and have a bond stronger than I could have hoped for.
They love their little brother and beg me to let them get him out of bed in the morning, and Jameson adores them. He is so excited to see them in the morning or when they come walking in from school. Jameson is always available for a hug or kiss and adds a piece to our family that was missing for so long. His sweet innocence is something that can brighten the darkest day. Yesterday I took him in the yard and simply followed him. He ran from plant to plant saying "flower, pretty" and "yum" after he smelled it. He picked up rocks and carried them around calling them balls, then happily ran inside when I told him it was time for lunch. After lunch he played with his trains (his new obsession) while I did laundry, after which we both went down for naps (in my silent house).
In the evening my wonderful John took us shopping then out for shakes. As we sat eating our ice cream I looked at my happy boys enjoying their sugar-induced high and felt so lucky. I never imagined being so content. Three fun, kind-hearted boys, and a husband I adore...life is pretty great.